GSA #7: How to Write a Ph.D. Dissertation (Part 1)

Psyyyyyyych! (Or is it "sike"?) As if I am able to write such a post. In fact, this is a post on how to write any ol' book-length project, but I just wanted to write a post using the above title. As my friends gear up to defend their dissertations—yay!—and I gear up to start revising my 200+ page monster—nooooo...—I thought it would be nice to recall some of the methods I used to "write a Ph.D. dissertation".

There are multiple books out there precisely on this topic (like this, this, and this—the top 3 hits for an Amazon search for "how to write a dissertation"). My cohort was told by our former Director of Graduate Studies (that's what it was called back then) that these books actually help, a sentiment that was echoed by my GUIDE mentor. Being me, of course, I went to check one out at the campus library—but since the popular ones were (believe it or not) already checked out, I borrowed Alison B. Miller's Finish Your Dissertation Once and for All! Apparently she got her Ph.D. in psychology and has a project management background, which actually suited my working style. (Never mind the fact that the title makes writing a dissertation sound like an excessive drinking habit that you need to kick.)

Anyway, if there are 10 ABDs in the room there are probably 10 ways to write a dissertation, so here I merely articulate what I ended up doing, in order to analyze it a bit and improve it for my next stage. (And of course, this is geared more toward the humanities than anything else.)

1. Take advantage of seminar papers—Any reason to write a paper is a good one, more so if you've got a prof responsible for giving you feedback (you hope). You can synthesize a whole term's worth of readings and discussion into a 10–20-page paper! Too bad for me, though, I am no longer taking seminars...which then makes it important that I...
2. Take advantage of (conference) presentations—(The motivation for this post, in fact, is a presentation I have to give in November for the grad students in my department.) Jot down the questions and comments you get, regardless of what you think of them or who asks/gives them—it's free feedback, take it!! (And honestly, the only reason I've been to cool cities like Boston, Toronto, and Singapore is because I've had conferences there. Conferences are a great opportunity to hear interesting presentations, and who knows, maybe you'll even find yourself a part of a book project.) 
3. Keep files and folders of your ideas—That means Word (etc.) files for things that interest you and Finder folders for all your papers, QE materials, conference abstracts, etc. Keep your words and find a place in the diss for everything—for now. (You can delete them later.) As I've said before, I'm better at editing than I am at writing—and I can only edit if there are words on the page. Besides, I write my dissertations like I cook my dinners: I don't pick out a recipe and go buy the necessary ingredients, I look at what's in my fridge and figure out what I can make from that. So: I look at what random papers are in my folders and figure out what dissertation I can write from them. It doesn't produce great meals, but at least you don't starve.  
4. Have a writing group—Nothing like good ol' peer pressure to churn out a dissertation! Have (bi-)monthly deadlines, meet up for coffee to give feedback, or just sit together in a room and vow not to leave until you've written the full 120 minutes (with breaks in between). It's such a good feeling to know you have company in moving these projects forward.
5. "Write Like a Motherfucker"—I didn't come up with that, one (TPII talks about who did), and two, I actually didn't write like a motherfucker my last year in grad school. (Other things in life happen even while working on these projects.) But writing is your job: You don't write only when you have brilliant insights, you don't write only when you feel like it. The fact that being an academic isn't a regular 8-to-5 job doesn't mean that you can't treat it like one—and sometimes you just have to work through it like you would any other job, while trying to strike that mythical work/life balance.