I Had a Panic Attack!

And it was bad panic attack. (But what panic attacks are not bad?) It was so bad that I couldn't even be bothered to choose a photo for this post. It was one of those "start sobbing uncontrollably in the bathroom and eventually crumple onto the floor" kinds of panic attacks, all the while saying "what do I do what do I do what do I do" in Japanese. So to the untrained ear it must have seemed extra disturbing.

This semester has been rough. It's bad enough having been sleep deprived for 9+ months, but not knowing how to make time for myself to get work done has been a drain. And worrying about people's health in a pandemic has been one for the ages.

But, as they say, this too shall pass. And whatever doesn't kill us only makes us stronger. So we just have to make sure to stay alive.

I Spawned a Human Being.

The big news since my last post 17 months ago is that I have spawned a human bean baby.

(Clearly The Child does not justify the 17-month break from blogging. But the break happened, so that is that.)

Since the birth of The Child, I have rethought my priorities, considering seriously how I want to live the life I want to live. And there are two things I've settled on.

First, while work brings income and income enables me to live, work itself is not as important as life itself.

Second, I have a tough time being nice when I am tired. 

Did I not know that before?? Regardless, next steps for me are to figure out how to achieve a work-life balance, when I need an income but want to be more present for, and kind to, my family. I am lucky and grateful to have employment during these crazy times, but I really must stop being so darn crabby...